The Gates of Valhalla

From the very beginning of the Universe, to primitive man's invention of Time, through the distant future when countless souls populate vast swaths of empty space, Valhalla shows us what really becomes of mankind when we let the politicians run the show. In an age where farce is the Universe's only unifying principle, where the only requirement for faster-than-light travel is proper footwear, where a cheap catchphrase and an orange brochure constitute what passes for religion, Stan has the audacity to resurrect his failing church business by turning the place into a bar and giving his customers what they really want. Stan's is the only church with the recipe for Salvation. They sell it on tap. Meanwhile, crotchety curmudgeon Gumballs finds himself trying to navigate the mind-numbing bureaucracy of the afterlife, his sin-surance policy wholly inadequate, the specter of eternal Hell looming every bit as wretched as an afternoon on C-SPAN. The Gates of Valhalla offers a hilarious yet biting satire on the foibles and fallibilities of everyday people, what they believe, and how they somehow manage to govern their daily lives. It dares to tackle such trivialities as life and death, heaven and hell, sin and redemption, Earth's corned beef claim to galactic fame, and the very survival of mankind. Jasper Grawl's side-splitting novel leads you straight to the gates and dares you to step through.